Saint Michael Instituition

Class 5A3 of 1967

Saint Michaels Institution » General Discussion

1. Robert de Silva
   Site Owner

   Something to take our minds away from the daily mundane.... so smile and live a little longer

   Wife's diary vs Husband's diary

   WIFE's DIARY

   Sunday night - I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a cafe to have some coffee. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.

   Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but his mind was far away. I asked him what was wrong - he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

   On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I love u, too."

   When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV; he seemed distant and absent.

   Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed. I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.

   My life is a disaster.

   HUSBAND's DIARY

   Today Manchester United lost again. Niamah.

   Posted 1 year ago #

2. Robert de Silva
   Site Owner

   Nov.08,2007
   Lessons in Life.

   Lesson 1
   A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.

   They rub it and a Genie comes out.

   The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."

   "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."

   Puff! She's gone.

   "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life."

   Puff! He's gone.

   "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.

   The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

   Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

   Lesson 2

   An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"

   The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."

   So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

   Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

   Lesson 3

   A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to

   the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

   "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.

   They're packed with nutrients."

   The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.

   The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

   Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

   He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

   Moral of the story: Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

   Lesson 4

   A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird

   froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

   While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

   As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.

   The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

   A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.

   Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and

   promptly dug him out and ate him.

   Morals of the story:

   (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

   (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

   (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

   CHEERS!!

   Thanks Moo Chee

   contributed by Kwan Moo Chee

   Posted 1 year ago #

3. Robert de Silva
   Site Owner

   Air Force One arrives at Heathrow and President Bush strides to a warm
   and dignified handshake from the Queen.

   They ride in a 1934 Bentley to the edge of central London where they
   board a
   magnificent 17th Century carriage hitched to six beautiful white horses.

   They ride towards Buckingham Palace,waving to the thousands of cheering
   Britons.

   All is going well. Suddenly the right rear horse passes wind with a
   most horrendous smell; an excruciating smell.

   Both of them had to use handkerchiefs over their noses.

   The Queen turns to President Bush, "Mr.President, please accept my
   regrets. I am sure you understand there are some things that even a
   Queen
   cannot control.

   George Bush, always trying to be "Presidential," replies:

   "Your Majesty, please do not give the matter another thought. If you
   had
   not mentioned it, I would have thought it was one of the horses."

   Contributed by Justin Gomez

   Posted 1 year ago #

4. Robert de Silva
   Site Owner

   Please do visit this website. Especially if you are based overseas. see our Malaysian talent. and while there enjoy yourself .

   www.comedycourt.com.my

   Posted 7 months ago #

RSS feed for this topic

Reply

You must log in to post.

Saint Michael Instituition © 2008 All Rights Reserved.

Designed and Maintained by www.thedesilva.com